Sunday, February 20, 2011

Catch up!

Just two months since my last post. Time has flown. And dragged. And flown.

I am so grateful for the stage God has us in now. Grateful. One reason I did not blog (aside from morning sickness, exhaustion, and so much unpacking/settling to do) was things were really rough here. Specifically, with mothering Elyana. Remember how I posted Elyana's 20 month update and explained how it was like being in a "honeymoon" stage with her??? Well, as with all stages, that one seemed to end as soon as we moved here.

We moved here on Oct 28th, flew out on the 29th, and were gone for 2 weeks to NC, followed by a 4-day cross-country drive in our truck while we towed our Mustang. All the travel, being in so many different places an beds and room set-ups, obviously was hard on her. In one hotel where we had an expected 5-hours of sleep before absolutely having to get up the next morning, after midnight when Elyana couldn't sleep and was in bed with us since the peapod was hopeless that night, she was crying "home, home" because I think she just didn't even know what that was anymore!!! :( So, when we finally got here on the 16th of November, we were bone-weary yet with a full house to unpack. And the next morning of course, I discovered one reason I was especially weary - our little one!!! (Can't help but smile!) What followed was 21 days exactly of Elyana waking between 2-10 times every single night, and not napping some days (she has always been so predictable and easily sleep-trained). Sometimes, it would start within 5 minutes of being laid down for the night, and she would call me every few minutes. Other times, she'd sleep peacefully for hours, and it would start in the wee morning hours. She would ask for very specific "stalling" type things like more water (of course that's fine!), crackers, me to sing to her, rock her, sleep in our bed, etc. I really did not feel there should be one firm answer (like always give water, but never sing to her any more than our usual pre-bedtime). I just really thought I should be understanding, gentle, but firmly continue to impress upon her "Ok, but it's night-night time right now. No more calling Momma just to ask me to sing." Of course, some nights I sang over and over. Some nights I told her "no more asking Momma to sing, if you ask again, I won't do it until morning." And I'd stick to that. After a couple weeks of that not working, we tried Jonathan going in instead of me (fail!). I tried telling her if she called again (after a bunch of times) that I would not come back. Different things worked different times. I prayed SO much those weeks. I prayed and prayed for wisdom, patience, discernment, and for her to have peace mostly!!! I just felt it was mostly an unsettledness in her spirit, and perhaps a bit of her learning how to start "bedtime excuses". But I felt she was really too young for that.

Anyway, I have heard over and over that it takes 21 days to form a new habit, and I honestly will say on night 22 here in this house, she slept through the night, without ever calling me, for the first time. And it continued for days. Now, we're more of 1-3 wake-ups per week, which is fairly normal for us. All I have to do is cover her, give her water, or just love on her. Half the time I think she's not really awake! I just want to say, children need and crave schedules and consistency so very much! I know the Lord has equipped me to be her mother specifically, and gives me wisdom when I ask (James 1:5,6).

Throughout all that, I was in the very hard stages of pregnancy sickness and exhaustion. I'm sure I was anemic, at once point I had to crawl up the stairs because I literally felt walking required too much exertion. :( (Thankfully, that was a day Jonathan had off and had taken Elyana out for a few hours so I could sleep.) But add my exhaustion to her lack of sleep, and there were nights I was just thinking "How can I ever, ever manage two children?"

Then, add to it Elyana starting (in December?) a very difficult willful, fussy/whiny, clingy-to-momma, unable to play by herself, and demanding stage. I really think it only just now ended, with the start of February (so three weeks of bliss). I know it's not easy being her, but it's also confusing being a parent to an angel one day and a little tyrant the next. :) We love her so very much, but that doesn't mean we have unlimited patience with every stage. Anyway, God is gracious and all I can say is, Thank You Jesus for this current phase.

It's not perfect. Certainly it's not like the honeymoon 20-month stage. But it's good! She makes up the cutest stories, is so interactive, has her favorite pastimes and books, loves crafting time, is eager to learn, and just melts our hearts with her outright singing and cracking jokes to herself. Even her mischief cracks me up. (For example, she currently thinks the words poop, toot, and pee are very funny. But she knows she's not suppose to say them casually. So she's taken to singing songs like "Winnie the Pooh" and instead saying "Winnie the Foop" because it rhymes with poop and therefore makes her giggle. See?!?!)

Now, what I haven't announced on here, since most of you all are facebook friends, is that we found out Baby #2 is a BOY!!!!! We are so very excited. We did not care, but what a joy it's been planning/dreaming for a boy. And I finally am really bonding to this child in a special way now that I know the gender. There's something that makes each kick and hiccup personal when I think "that's my son" or "that's my little guy." We talk to Elyana about her "baby brother" and it's been wonderful feeling like I am getting months to prepare her in a mental and tangible way for his arrival. And how very excited I am to be halfway now, halfway to meeting him, our surprise, miracle, baby boy!

Ok, I apologize for the novel. Love you all very much!!!!

1 comment:

Two_As_One said...

Such a good update! Thanks for sharing your thought and experiences so we can connect with you from NC. We live you all so much!
Love,
Fred and Mary